Bun's Story - The End

My phone rang and I answered it.  The vet agreed Bun definitely seemed lethargic, her temperature was “down significantly” so they were trying to warm her up and her stomach was “doughy” when she palpated it.  I told the vet about her kind of grinding her teeth at times and she said she saw it and tried to look in her mouth and was able to tell her molars were a bit “off”.  Grinding of teeth is a sign of pain and some combination of what was going on with Bun was causing her a lot of pain.  At this point I had two main options, try everything to get her back to normal [this included x-rays, ultrasounds of her belly, force feedings and more] or put her down.  Through my now streaming tears, I asked what she would do if it were her rabbit, somehow knowing in the back of my head already what the answer would be.  I asked if it was ok if I called my husband to talk to him before I made a decision.

I called Jeremy crying and doing my best to explain to him what was happening.  We both knew what would be best for Bun.  Since Jake was already asleep, we had to wake him up and called my mom to bring him over to watch him.  Once Jeremy dropped him off, he was on his way up to Bothell himself.

I called the vet back and told her my decision.  She asked if I wanted to say goodbye and I couldn’t imagine not, so they let me in a side door that led directly to a room where Bun was waiting for me.  I took some pictures with my cell phone as I knew this would be my last memories with her and I told her how much I loved her and how sorry I was.  While waiting for Jeremy, the vet brought in various paperwork to fill out and sign, asking what I wanted to do with the body, if I wanted an autopsy and a general estimate of costs.  I remember my tears splashing onto the paper as I struggled to write my name.  Jeremy finally arrived and they let him into the room with me. 

The vet explained how the procedure would go.  First she would inject her with a medication to basically make her drowsy and pain free.  Once that set in and she didn’t flinch to a pinch test, she would turn her over and inject the lethal medication directly into her heart.  It wouldn’t be long and then she would be gone. The vet asked if I wanted to be present during the procedure or if I’d rather she do it in a different room.  Jeremy offered to stay in case I didn’t want to be there, but still wanted someone with Bun.  As hard as it was, I wanted to stay with Bun.  I wanted every last second I could have with her.

I gave Bun more head pets and rubber my fingers through her ears like she loved as the vet administered the first medication.  She said she would come back in a few minutes to see if it had taken effect.  Bun’s nose twitches started slowing.  The vet came in and pinched Bun’s foot to see if she’d react; she didn’t.  She carefully unwrapped Bun from the towel that was surrounding her and placed her on her side.  She felt around her chest to see where her ribs were.  Once she found the spot, she pushed the needle into her heart and gave her the final dose of medication.  She took the needle out and brought out her stethoscope to listen to her heart.  After a minute or so, she told me that she was gone.  The vet left the room to give us a few minutes with Bun.

My sweet girl was gone.  My one connection to my grandma was gone.  I felt total regret for how her life was.  As I sobbed into Jeremy, he reminded me that most people would have given up on her within the first year of her life.  I was able to get 6 quality years of love with her.  I knew it was true, but I had a rock in my throat and my mind was barely able to concentrate on breathing.  As Jeremy drove me home, I sent an email to my work letting them know what happened and that I needed at least 1 day off.  We got home sometime around 5:30 and went to bed.  I don’t remember how long I slept, but when I woke up, my eyes were almost swollen shut.  I started crying again.  I was angry.  This was the first day of working from home and I was supposed to be spending it with Bun.  I struggled with how to tell people because non pet owners are easy to say “it’s just a rabbit” and not have emotion tied to it.  She was more than that to me, she was my friend and my comfort.  I stopped crying long enough to go back up to Bothell with Jeremy to pick up my car.

A few days later, I got an email from the vet with Bun’s post mortem results.  I both wanted to read it, but also wanted to ignore it and be in denial.  This is what the vet found “…several indicators of chronic disease in her liver as well as in her great vessels (particularly her aorta).  She also had a torsion or twisting of part of her cecum, which would have likely required surgery to try to fix.”  Looking back, to just get her corrective surgery would have been hard on her, but that coupled with the liver disease and issues in her heart, she might not have survived the operation.  This was as comforting of news as I could have hoped for, but it still didn’t bring my baby girl back.  It took me over a month to clean her cage and even to this day, the food is still in her dish where she left it in March.  I still have food, hay and litter left of hers and I both want to donate it, but don’t want to get rid of my last piece of Bun.  I’m not sure if I’m ready for a new bunny or not either.  All I know is that I miss her.  I miss smelling her and how she smelled like a cumulus cloud.  I missed petting that little patch of fur on the back of her neck that was somehow softer than silk.  I missed rubbing my fingers over her head and through her ears and hearing her teeth chatter as she loved being pet.  6 years didn’t feel like enough time.

My last selfie with Bun at 2:43 am

Bun's Story - Part 3

Nothing overly notable happened for a while, except my almost 1 year old son’s first word.  I was in Bun’s room, holding her and he walked up to the baby gate at the entrance to the room.  I asked him who I was holding and he said “beh-beh”.  I made him say it again and he did and every time I pointed to a bunny (in a book or Bun), he would repeat “beh-beh”. My son’s first word was bunny.  This is what I had always hoped for.  As Jake got bigger, I’d let him spend more time in the room with Bun.  He loved helping feed her and giving her treats.  When we’d put her away for the night (because bunnies can’t be trusted…it’s a fact, google it), he’d always give her a hug and a kiss.

I don’t recall the exact day, but I do know Bun went through another episode of stasis and had to be fed critical care and other medications for a little while, but other than being scary at the moment, it was overall uneventful.  On August 31^st, 2019, I took Bun back to the vet because I noticed a little squiggle in her left eye.  Needless to say, I was paranoid about eyes by this point and was worried she would end up losing her other eye and instead of being a pirate, she’d be blind.  The vet told me not to worry and that it just looked like beginning stages of cataracts.  So what did I do when I got home?  Googled blind bunnies.  I guess I would just cross that bridge when I got there.

We gave Bun an arbitrary birthday of December 1^st, 2013 when I first started filling out paper work for various vets.  We celebrated her 6^th birthday the same way I did her 1^st birthday; with a giant veggie pile and pictures in a homemade party hat that she clearly disapproved of [picture].  By the end of December, the whole world started talking about Coronavirus.  As far as we knew, it hadn’t made it to the US yet, but it was only a matter of time.  The end of February started getting pretty interesting as things were starting to ramp up.  Vulnerable people were supposed to work from home, people suddenly realized they needed to wash their hands (why was this a new thing?) and it was suggested we wear masks in public places.  By mid-March, we had gotten word that my work was closing down in person operations and everything was to be done remotely.  As scary as the virus was, I was looking forward to some quality Bun time because her room is the office where the computer I would be using was.

Sunday, March 22^nd, 2020, I woke up and fed Bun and gave her some loves like I always do in the morning.  I noticed a couple extra pellets were still in her dish and her hay wasn’t as low as I would expect it to be, but I just chalked it up to Jake giving too much food the night before because he was insistent he feed her.  I can’t remember what I did that day, but I ended up back home sometime after 10:30 pm and went to tuck Bun in for the night and give her the rest of her allotted food.  It didn’t look like she had touched any of her food, water or hay.  I tried giving her a treat, but she didn’t even want that.  I started to panic that it was stasis again and how long had she been like this and I didn’t realize it?  I called her vet (who has an on call doctor) and asked what I should do.  I still had critical care at home from the last time in case she needed to be fed something or I could bring her in.  For my piece of mind, I drove the hour North to Bothell at 1:00am to bring her in.  Due to Covid restrictions, I had to wait in the car while they examined Bun and wait for a phone call from the doctor for the findings.

Jake giving Bun some lovin

The little squiggle I saw

Bun's 6th birhtday!

Bun's Story - Part Deux

In August, I was finally clear headed enough to make Bun’s appointment for her spay and in early August, she went in for her procedure.  Luckily, everything went as planned and the nurse said that Bun was so cute she shared the cilantro from her lunch with her.  Bun came home and recovered like a champ.  But on August 28^th, 2014, I noticed a spot of blood pooling in Bun’s right eye, like a blood vessel had broken.  I took her to the vet and they didn’t seem concerned about it and said it would probably go away with time.  On October 26^th, 2014 rolled around, Bun’s right eye was so cloudy and filled with blood that I’m not fully certain she could see so I took her to a different vet.  This vet drew blood on Bun and she tested positive for E. cuniculi. [Parasite found in bunnies].  She gave Bun a month’s worth of medicine to take.  Now, you’re probably wondering, how do you feed a rabbit medicine?  At first, she was really good at taking it if we mixed it with a tiny bit of fruit flavored baby food.  In her later years, we learned the burrito method where you wrap up the bunny in a towel and basically force the syringe into their mouth and slowly push the plunger. 

After the month of medication, her eye didn’t look any better so we got a referral to an animal ophthalmologist in Seattle.  Once every 2-3 weeks I would take her up there to have various eye tests done and bring home eye drops to administer at least twice a day.  This went on until February 4^th, 2015.  I got home from work and the first thing I did was take Bun out of her day cage to hop freely.  I noticed she was standing still and her head was tilted ever so slightly.  When she finally did hop, it seemed like her equilibrium was off because she kind of stumbled.  Jeremy and I rushed her to the after-hours emergency vet in Tacoma where they gave us a small pharmacy of medications.  They thought it could either be the E. cuniculi again, ear mites or a brain tumor.  We opted not to have the scan done of her head as they would have had to sedate her and I was worried she wouldn’t wake back up.  So I started giving her oral medications 3 times a day for about a week.  Then she stopped eating and drinking.  I read about this while doing my research and knew it could be life threatening for a bunny to go 1 day without food.  I was able to get into the vet [ #2 if you’re keeping track at home] and they administered IV fluids and sent me home with critical care (which is basically ground up bunny food that you mix with water and syringe feed them, but it has all the nutrients they need).  So me, 6 months pregnant, was syringe feeding my bunny medicine and food for about two weeks straight.  Every other day for those two weeks, I took her to the vet for another round of subcutaneous fluids. 

By March she was done with the medicine and eating again on her own.  I was taking my dog in to the vet for his yearly shots when my vet asked how Bun was doing.  I told her that she made a full recovery.  It was then she told me that when I brought Bun in the last time, she didn’t expect her to make it through the week.  She called her a “miracle bunny”.  Bun’s eye never did get better, so she gave me a referral to an exotic vet up in Bothell.  I took her in for an initial exam and they recommended the eye be removed.  I had reservations about it because I was still scared something would happen under anesthesia, so we opted not to do surgery right away.  Eventually, her eye started bulging out in a cone shape and was completely whited over.  I started getting the impression she was in pain, so I scheduled the appointment for surgery.  January 2016, Bun got her eye removed and after two days of rest, she was almost like a completely new bunny.  She seemed happier and more energetic.

The first time I noticed something off

As it got worse

Bun exactly 1 year from the day I brought her home

Eventually her eye was completely whited out

This was the "worst" of the head tilt

After she had her eye removed

Bun's Story - A Multi Part Series

It was a week or two into December 2013 when Jeremy approached me with a question.  He wanted to get me a Christmas present, but wasn’t sure if I would be ok with it, so he wanted to know whether I wanted it, but at the same time didn’t want to ruin the surprise.  Of course, I was puzzled and tried to think of everything it could be, but alas, I was stumped.  I told him it was ok to tell me and that’s when he asked if I wanted a baby bunny.  I was giddy!  After the initial shock of getting something so amazing, I asked him more questions about where the bunny was from and how old it was, etc.  Apparently, his coworker [at the time] bought two female bunnies and had them for a month and one day discovered that one was not in fact female.  He had a new litter of kits that needed homes.  So naturally I said I wanted one and asked if I could get a picture to pick it out. Of course I picked the runt because it was so it’ll bitty.  My new bunny wouldn’t be ready to come home for another week or two as it was still too little.

Two weeks went by and I found out it would be a little longer than normal because rather than separating the two adults, the coworker left them together a little too long and the momma had more babies.  Apparently, my bunny was “taking care of” some of the other babies so he didn’t want to separate that one yet.  Finally, January 9^th, 2014, I got to pick up my bunny.  It was so small and fit in the palm of one hand!  We had no idea whether or not it was a boy or a girl and the soonest we would be able to make it to the vet would be on Saturday (2 days later).  So until we found out, we just called it Bun.  Of course, this didn’t stop the Facebook polls of what should we name the bunny.  Saturday finally came and the vet came out of the back with the bunny and said “it’s a girl!”  My first instinct was to go to the store and get an “it’s a girl” balloon and do a photo shoot because why wouldn’t I? 

Of course, with this photo shoot, I had to announce a name so I pooled all of my favorites together and Bun’s official name was Cinnamon Bun Ape Cakes Peaches Poof Averie Snowball IV Olson the first.  Now for the reasoning behind the long name.  Cinnamon because her eyes were creepy red, Bun because that’s what we had been calling her until we knew her sex, Ape Cakes because my 4 year old niece picked out the name, Peaches was from a Facebook poll and I had considered it before someone else suggested it, Poof because she was a little fluff ball, Averie because that’s what my other 4 year old ‘niece’ picked out, Snowball IV from the Simpsons and Olson the first because she was the first of her name.  Naturally, we ended up calling her Bun or B or little b for short, but she had a formal name.

I hadn’t owned a bunny since 5^th grade when I had Hocus Pocus, so I figured I should probably brush up on rabbit care.  I spent quite a bit of time on the Google and found a family owned company that sold hay and pellets from Central Washington, so I knew it would be fresh and I picked out a rabbit savvy vet that was local.  I had read that you want to spay your rabbits as they are prone to uterine cancer, but I couldn’t do that until she was at least 6 months old. 

At the time, my grandma was living in an adult care facility and I would bring Bun to visit her.  I was always amazed at how relaxed Bun was and how she loved being held.  Out of curiosity, I thought about getting her certified as an emotional support animal, but never did follow though.  Around the 6 month mark, Jeremy and I were going on a two week trip to Hawaii for a friend’s wedding then our postponed honeymoon.  We got back in early June and that’s when my grandma’s health took a turn for the worse.  Over the course of the next month and a half, she slowly declined until they focused only on palliative care.  My grandpa had passed away 3 days after we got Bun and now, 5 months later, I lost my grandma too.  I held Bun a little longer over the next week because I felt like she was my only connection to my grandma anymore.

Bun's first photo - she the runt at the top

The first time I held Bun

You can see why I wanted to call her Poof

Hocus Pocus

Bun and Grandma